Hope
Hope is the desire for a certain thing to happen. A feeling of expectation. When there is nothing else, hope may be all you have. On the breast cancer journey, you are faced with a roller coaster of feelings and emotions. Many doctors, even more appointments, good news as well as bad news.
Often times through the ups and downs, you will feel all alone. Alone with nothing but your thoughts and mere HOPE.
What Do You Hope For?
For better news
That this is some mistake
For shorter treatment regimen
For the chemo and radiation to work
That your hair will not fall out
That your hair will grow back
For the side effects to end
To get back to a normal life (or at least your new normal)
To be cured of cancer
Throughout my journey, I had HOPE that all these things would come to pass. Likewise, some people have hope in their doctors, in their families, or even their significant others. For me, my hope was most evident in the middle of the night and the wee hours of the mornings, when the tears always threatened to fall, and eventually got their way. During the day, it was game face on, and no time to stop and think. At night, I was alone with just my thoughts. At least that’s how I felt and thought. Those were actually the moments when my greatest source of hope was with me. Just me and God!
Don’t Give Up
There are many reasons why people give up hope. It may be due to their circumstances and situation. It may also be due to the fatigue of treatment, which is both mental and physical. When you feel like you are losing hope just remember IICorinthians 4:17-18.
Believe me I know first hand that “momentary” actually seems to last a lifetime. Regardless, keep pushing.
What is your hope anchored in? A cure, a medication, your physician, surgery, etc.
I have wanted a tattoo, and for many months I contemplated what I could possibly want permanently affixed to my body. Something that would never change. Near the end of my chemo regimen it came to me.
Remembering The Journey
My journey will never be forgotten. How could it? But most importantly this tattoo is a reminder of the times when all the chips were down, and I felt like there was no end it sight. When no one understood. Hope got me through. I also found hope and encouragement through reading this book, When God And Cancer Meet.